“It’s so hard being single again, I’ve been in a relationship for the last 4 years and it feels like starting from square one all over again. I’ve slowly gotten over my breakup, I’ve been dressing better, have gotten back into shape, yet at this point, I have no idea what to do or where I should even try meeting women since I hate going to bars and clubs.”
Whether you’re newly single and coming out of a long-term relationship, or you have no dating experience and you’re trying to figure how to practice your social skills, expand your network, and meet women, it can be a challenge since you’re starting from square one.
No matter your situation, there’s no better time than right now to go out and start meeting women. If you live in a vibrant metropolitan area or even a decent-sized city, the odds are in your favor. You have thousands of opportunities to meet women that you’re attracted to, may have chemistry with, and get a new girlfriend if that’s your goal.
Your next question might be, “how do I start, and where are the best places to meet women?”
To help you figure out where you want to begin your search, I’ve put together a comprehensive list of the 20 best places to meet women other than a bar or club to expand your social network, build new friendships, and most of all meet potential dates.
It’s okay if nightlife isn’t your scene. There are plenty of places on this list where you can rebuild your social and dating life. A lot of men make the mistake of going straight to the bars and clubs, whether they’re coming out of a long-term relationship or have no dating experience.
But this is often a distraction and a quick fix to cope with the difficult emotions of a breakup. Most conventional dating advice usually gives men and women strategies and tactics on how to attract and seduce each other in a nightlife setting such as a bar or a club.
Trying to meet romantic interests in a crowded bar has lots of variables and circ*mstances that are out of your control. It’s a process of having to scope out the environment for someone you’re interested in, dealing with her group of friends, determining whether or not she’s single, approaching her with an opening line to get her attention, plus the added social pressure of trying to sustain a conversation in a loud environment. Not exactly the most ideal setting for getting to know someone, nurturing a deeper connection, and getting yourself a girlfriend in the long run.
Without further ado, here are the 20 best places to meet women:
Get Physically Active
If you’re physically active or trying to get back into shape, what better way to kill two birds with one stone than join a workout group, a co-ed sports league, or running club.
The beauty about joining these clubs, besides finding like minded people, having accountability, and a fun way to get into shape, is that it helps you expand your social circle. These classes are usually packed with fit and attractive women looking to break a sweat and socialize.
And from my own personal experience, because of the accountability and support system, you’re more likely to stick with your fitness goals, since you’re doing it with other people who are going through the same thing, which keeps you from getting bored and losing motivation.
If you have no idea where to find these types of clubs or if you live in the New York Metropolitan Area, I recommend checking this list out:
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/sports-and-fitness/best-new-fitness-classes-in-nyc
- https://www.harpersbazaar.com/uk/beauty/fitness-wellbeing/news/g36296/the-best-fitness-classes-for-2016/
Volunteer
If you’re the type of person that likes to do good for the community and you genuinely love helping people, one of the best places to meet women is volunteering.
Along with having the added benefit of being in an environment with like-minded people who want to serve the community, what better way to communicate to a girl what kind of person you are than volunteering your time for a cause you genuinely care about.
In the case you don’t know what causes you care about or what to do, I’d recommend making a list of things you deeply care about or if you still have no idea you can take a look at this list:
- https://www.moneycrashers.com/good-places-volunteer-opportunities-organizations/
- https://www.thedailymeal.com/6-best-places-volunteer-nyc
Take Dance Classes
This one may take you out of your comfort zone, but if you want to get the most out of your social and dating life, getting out of your comfort zone is essential.
Learning how to dance is not only a fun way to get yourself into really good shape, it also has its social benefits. Besides impressing your friends, family, and the ladies next time you’re out, it’s a really fun way to meet women. For guys who are uncomfortable with touching (in the context of flirting & seduction), it can really help.
If you’re not sure where to start or what specific dance style you want to learn, I recommend dipping your toes and trying as many styles as possible until you find a good fit. You can also choose to focus on partner dancing styles such as salsa, bachata, ballroom, foxtrot, tango, etc.
Take a look at this list below to get some ideas:
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/dance/the-best-dance-classes-for-adults
- https://coursehorse.com/ (If you live in any major city besides NYC)
Take a Cooking Class
Other than making pretty mean omelettes, in terms of cooking skills I’m somewhere between a microwave warrior and your creative/paraphernalia friendly executive chef.
After experimenting with my culinary curiosities, I’ve learned that good food is the one thing in the world that brings people together no matter your background. Besides meeting interesting people from all walks of life, cooking classes are a fun way to not only learn how to be competent behind the stove or grill, but to meet and connect with women.
If you’re a foodie and want to find out where your nearest cooking class is you can check out the following links:
- https://www.nycgo.com/articles/nyc-cooking-classes (If you live in the New York Metro Area)
- https://coursehorse.com/ (If you live in any major city besides NYC)
- https://www.surlatable.com/category/cat2211278/In+Store+Classes (If you live outside of NYC)
Acting & Improv Classes
A few years ago I took an improv class to be able to think on the fly, prepare for job interviews, and get out of my head when I’m interacting with people.
Besides the added skill-sets to my social toolbox, I’ve managed to meet some amazing people in these classes, including my last girlfriend before she moved. My friend and I were the only two guys in this class of 10, with the other 8 all being women. Just like the last 4 suggestions, these classes are specifically designed to breed social interaction.
If you’re not sure where to take these classes you can check out the following links:
- http://newyork.cbslocal.com/top-lists/5-best-places-to-take-improv-classes-in-nyc/
- https://www.bestproducts.com/fun-things-to-do/a799/best-acting-classes-nyc-near-me/
- https://coursehorse.com/ (If you live outside NYC or check out Google maps since it’s localized)
Music Lessons
Just like acting and improv, music classes are meant to bring people together to build a community and hone their craft. Whether you want to learn how to sing, join a choir, produce music, start a band, or learn how to play a musical instrument, these are probably one of the best environments to meet women.
Social Events
Whether it’s a networking event, your alma mater’s alumni events, a young professionals organization, fundraiser, or a charity, many of these social events attract women and provide you with a social context to easily converse with practically anyone. Most people go to these social events to make new friends & expand their social network. Be confident, be flexible, and most importantly be social.
If you’re not sure how to find these types of events just like the causes you care about list, I recommend creating a list of the things that you’re really interested in & check out:
- https://www.eventbrite.com/
- https://www.meetup.com/
- https://www.livingsocial.com/
- https://feverup.com/ (In case you’re a night owl and want to find alternatives to the nightlife scene)
Attend a Concert
Just like food, music connects people. Whether you’re into indie, pop, or hip-hop, the beauty about music is that there are different genres for different personalities and tastes. Concerts, shows, and music festivals are all amazing places to get social and meet women.
A quick tip: a great time to chat people up is when you’re in line for the show or at the concession stand before the show starts. I wouldn’t recommend trying to talk to a girl you’re interested in during the middle of the show.
If it’s a show where people are dancing, if you took my advice by taking dance classes, this is where it would come in handy. Don’t forget to have fun and be mindful and don’t try to grind on her or be the creepy guy who grinds on women from behind.
If you’re not sure what concerts are going on in your area, I’d recommend checking out the following links:
- https://seatgeek.com/tba/festivals/music-festivals/
- https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/art-books-music/g14534668/summer-music-festivhttps://pitchfork.com/events/als-2018/
- https://pitchfork.com/events/
Go To or Host a Party
Whether it’s a small house party, get-together, or barbeque, these are wonderful ways to meet women.
If you don’t get invited to parties and you’ve managed to nurture a social circle from trying out the last seven tips I provided for you, then try hosting your own get-together or party.
Check out the following link to learn more about how to throw a great party:
If you want to figure out where most parties, events, or get-togethers are thrown, or get some ideas for throwing your own themed parties, check out these links:
- https://app.discotech.me/?_branch_match_id=484414857049154876
- https://feverup.com/
- http://www.businessinsider.com/32-massive-parties-from-around-the-world-2015-5
The Dog Park
If you have a dog, you’re a dog lover, or you want to get some fresh air with your best friend, the dog park is one of the best places to meet women.
Not only are dogs man’s best friend, I’d argue they’re also man’s best wingman. It’s really easy to get social and meet women this way. Play with her dog, chat her up, and you might even end up setting up a playdate to let your dogs play while you hang out together.
If you want to find out where the nearest dog park is, you can check out the following links:
- https://www.bringfido.com/
- https://www.nycgovparks.org/facilities/dogareas
- https://barkpost.com/life/bring-dogs-to-summer-events/
The Coffee Shop
Coffee shops are a great place to meet women if you’re a caffeine addict like myself. During the week you’ll see tons of people working on their MacBooks and tablets at coffee shops. Whether you’re a student, a writer, or you work remotely, I’d argue coffee shops are probably the most underutilized way to meet and socialize with women.
If you spot a girl you’re interested in and it’s peak hours at the coffee shop, just ask her if you can sit by her table since it’s packed, or just sit down at the table next to her if there’s an open spot.
After getting settled in, ask her if she knows what the Wi-Fi password is, if she’s got an iPhone charger, or ask her what food or drink she recommends if it’s not a Starbucks or a chain. Just be mindful, if she doesn’t look stressed, completely consumed with work, or is on the phone, get creative and segue to ask her what she’s doing.
Any Starbucks or Panera will do, but if you’re not a fan of franchises or coffee chains you can check out this list:
The Grocery Store
For some strange reason, especially when I’m doing my grocery shopping and running errands, I’ve always managed to meet the prettiest women at the local Whole Foods.
It’s really easy to come off as creepy if you’re trying to chat up the pretty brunette you saw at the frozen food section, so the best tip I can offer is stay away from using weird innuendos and puns involving melons, bananas, and other foods shaped like sexual organs.
The best time to socialize with a girl at the local grocery store is while you’re in the checkout line or you’re waiting in line for a fresh cut of meat or fish.
But if there aren’t any women in line and you manage to see a girl that’s really caught your eye, I’d recommend chatting her up at the food court since a lot of Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, and even Costco’s have large food courts.
If you’re not sure how to break the ice, take a look at one of our previous articles on how to approach a girl before you try chatting up the cute brunette next time you go grocery shopping.
Public Transportation
Public transportation can be one of the hardest places to strike up a conversation with a girl, but also incredibly rewarding if it goes well. It’s quite ironic because you could be sitting next to the same person for the next hour on the bus or train during rush hour.
There are plenty of opportunities to chat a girl up, but the most important this is to be mindful of her emotions, space, and comfort. It’s very easy to come off as a creepy guy if you’re not aware of these things
If you don’t want to come off as a creep, please take a look at our article on how to not be creepy before attempting to chat up the next girl that catches your eye on your daily commute.
Galleries and Art Museums
If you love art or want to get in touch with your inner creative, the museum is one of the best places to meet cultured, intelligent, and sophisticated women. One of the best things about art that it’s open to interpretation, so don’t be afraid to chat up any girl that’s deeply immersed in the experience of an art piece.
Museums and art galleries are usually under-attended, so do your research before you check out the exhibit. Most of them usually host events that include live music, free food, and donating to charitable causes.
If you’re not sure how to find these places check out the following links:
- http://www.museumsusa.org/museums/ (outside NYC)
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/attractions/museums-in-nyc
- https://www.nyctourist.com/community/waterfront-museum.htm
Political Campaigning
Politics is always a touchy subject when it comes to most people, but if you’re a curious person and you’re really interested in politics, I’d recommend volunteering your time to help out your local senator, congressman, mayor, or whatever public servant is running for political office.
I don’t identify with any specific political party but in the past I’ve volunteered to campaign for both Republican and Democratic officials. If you’re really passionate about politics, this is a great way to network and even meet women that are interested in the same political causes that you care about
If you’re not sure how to find these events take a look at:
- https://www.eventbrite.com/
- https://www.meetup.com/
- https://www.campaignsandelections.com/events
- https://www.politico.com/live-events/upcoming
Wine Tasting
If you’re a wine connoisseur or want to learn about wine, these are great places to meet people and have real and intelligent conversations with women, compared to a regular bar or a nightclub.
Check out the following links to find out where the nearest wine tasting is taking place:
- https://www.groupon.com/local/new-york-city/wine-tasting
- http://www.localwineevents.com/events/by_date (If you live outside NYC)
- https://citywinery.com/newyork/winemaking/tours-tasting-room.html
Speed Dating & Singles Events
I can attest that speed dating is a fun alternative to meeting women at a very high volume in the shortest amount of time. The best part is, if it doesn’t work out or you just don’t click with whoever you’re matched with, you’re immediately matched with another person.
Speed dating events usually provide questionnaires and surveys for you to fill out to match you with people who have similar interests and traits. If you don’t like structure and love spontaneity, I’d recommend just trying it out and socializing with as many women as possible, even if they’re not in your cohort.
I can tell you from experience that most of the dates I’ve gotten were girls I talked to before the event in the lounge area. The funniest part is, I was never matched with them during the actual event.
If you live in the NY metro area, check out the following links:
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/sex-dating/best-places-for-speed-dating-in-nyc
- https://www.speednydating.com/
If you live in a major metropolitan area or even a decent sized city, there’s a high probability of singles events including happy hours, singles cruises, and more. I’d recommend checking out the following link:
Go to a Book Signing or Your Local Bookstore
If you’re an avid bookworm or just love to read, these are probably the best places to meet intellectually curious women. I’d recommend checking out the events page on your local bookstore or Barnes & Noble website so you can see what major celebrity or author is visiting to do a talk and book signing.
Faith & Spiritual Based Activities
If you are religious or spiritual, I’d recommend getting involved with your local church, temple, synagogue, or maybe even your meditation group’s social events and activities.
Stand Up Comedy & Slam Poetry (Open Mic Night)
If you want to get in touch with your inner Dave Chappelle or watch poets express themselves as if they were MMA fighters competing for a championship belt, these events are filled with people from all walks of life and are often a great place to meet women.
If you’re in NYC and want to find out where your nearest comedy club or open mic night is located, check out the following links:
- https://theculturetrip.com/north-america/usa/new-york/articles/10-places-to-experience-poetry-readings-in-nyc/
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/comedy/best-comedy-clubs-in-new-york
- https://www.timeout.com/newyork/comedy/best-comedy-shows-in-nyc-this-month
So there you have it, the best places to meet women other than bars & clubs.
‘Til Next Time,
-Rob V.
As a relationship and social dynamics enthusiast with extensive experience in advising individuals on dating and socializing, I understand the challenges that can come with re-entering the dating scene. The article you've shared provides a comprehensive guide on alternative places to meet women, emphasizing a diverse range of activities to cater to different interests and preferences. Let's break down the concepts used in the article:
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Introduction to the Challenge: The author starts by empathizing with the difficulty of being single again after a long-term relationship. This establishes a relatable and understanding tone.
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Encouragement and Timing: The article emphasizes that regardless of one's situation, the present moment is an opportune time to start meeting new people, particularly women. This sets a positive and proactive tone.
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Avoiding the Nightlife Scene: The author critiques the conventional approach of going to bars and clubs, citing it as a distraction and a quick fix for dealing with post-breakup emotions. This provides context for the alternative suggestions.
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List of Alternative Places: The bulk of the article comprises a detailed list of 20 alternative places to meet women, avoiding bars and clubs. The suggestions cover a wide range of activities and interests.
a. Get Physically Active: Recommends joining workout groups, sports leagues, or running clubs to not only stay fit but also expand social circles.
b. Volunteer Work: Highlights the benefits of volunteering, both for the community and as a way to meet like-minded individuals.
c. Take Dance Classes: Encourages stepping out of one's comfort zone to learn how to dance, citing it as a fun way to stay active and socialize.
d. Take a Cooking Class: Suggests cooking classes as a means to connect with people while honing culinary skills.
e. Acting & Improv Classes: Advocates for taking improv classes to enhance social skills and meet new people in a creative environment.
f. Music Lessons: Recommends joining music classes or groups to build a community and potentially meet women with similar interests.
g. Social Events: Highlights the variety of social events like networking, alumni gatherings, and fundraisers as opportunities to expand one's social network.
h. Attend a Concert: Proposes attending concerts, shows, or music festivals as social settings to meet people with shared musical interests.
i. Go To or Host a Party: Suggests attending or hosting parties as a way to socialize and meet potential romantic interests.
j. The Dog Park: Recommends the dog park as a casual and enjoyable place to meet women while enjoying the company of pets.
k. The Coffee Shop: Advocates for approaching women in coffee shops during non-peak hours as an opportunity for casual conversation.
l. The Grocery Store: Suggests striking up conversations with women at the grocery store, particularly in the checkout line or food court.
m. Public Transportation: Acknowledges the challenges of striking up conversations on public transportation but highlights the potential rewards.
n. Galleries and Art Museums: Recommends visiting museums and art galleries to meet cultured and sophisticated women.
o. Political Campaigning: Encourages volunteering for political campaigns as a way to meet individuals with similar political interests.
p. Wine Tasting: Recommends attending wine tastings for those interested in wine, offering a sophisticated and social atmosphere.
q. Speed Dating & Singles Events: Advocates for speed dating as a fun way to meet a variety of people in a short amount of time.
r. Book Signings or Local Bookstore: Suggests attending book signings or events at local bookstores for those interested in literature.
s. Faith & Spiritual Based Activities: Recommends getting involved in local religious or spiritual activities to meet like-minded individuals.
t. Stand Up Comedy & Slam Poetry: Advocates attending open mic nights for comedy or poetry as a way to engage with people from diverse backgrounds.
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Conclusion: The article concludes with a friendly sign-off, summarizing the presented ideas and encouraging readers to explore these alternative avenues for meeting women.
Overall, the article provides a well-rounded guide, offering diverse suggestions for individuals seeking to expand their social circles and meet potential romantic partners in settings beyond traditional bars and clubs.
